::kenapa ko gemok sgt ni aina???::

for those who are utterly insensitive and absurdly clueless, i do have mirrors at home. so yes, i know i'm fat. i am not blind la. i have tonnes of clothes that i cannot fit anymore. in fact almost my whole closet i'd say. it just doesnt help when everytime i go somewhere where i'll meet old 'friends', they'll point it out. REPEATEDLY!!

like hello, are you intentionally trying to bring me down????? so insensitive!! fyi, i was really trying not to yell at you for your ignorance and insensitivity. 

let me point out something here. maybe it will seep into your stupid brain somehow. i DID NOT INTENTIONALLY trying to make myself fat! for your information, i went through fertility treatments for months and unfortunately, i fall under the category of women who gains weight during this period. why? because of the fertility medicines la idiot! but of course since you guys are a bunch of bozos who know only about your own world, ignorant about everything else, tats y i dont even bother to tell you when you pointed out my fat body. buat penat je ckp dgn org bodo, bukan paham pun kan..  

so no, aku bukan sengaja la nak gemok! sape yg insane yg sengaja nk naik badan dari XS/S to M/L???? pikir la bangang!! in fact, at one time, i became very depressed due to my sudden excessive weight gain. dont u think i'd feel anything with my condition now? fertility treatment has taken a huge toll on my body, and sadly it hasnt produce any result yet. so of course, i felt lagi lagi lagi la crushed.

plus those yg tanya "ko pregnant ke?" and when i answered no, comes the next common questions of "bila lagi?" or say "cepat la sikit dpt baby" or somewhere near there. please la, those statements n questions kan, how do u expect us to answer u hah? only Allah can betul tak.. 

now i have decided to put making babies aside for awhile, agreed and supported by my husband, and together we try to lose weight. insyaAllah when i'm ready to put my body through all those topsy turvy journey again, i will try again. 

p/s: sorry for the uber emotional entry.