::kantoi::

this was from my mummy's email too.. funny hihihihi..

...............................................................................................................

Why husband should not answer.....

WIFE: 'What would you do if I died? Would you get married again? 

HUSBAND: 'Definitely not! 

WIFE: 'Why not? Don't you like being married?' 

HUSBAND: 'Of course I do. 

WIFE: 'Then why wouldn't you remarry? 

HUSBAND: 'Okay, okay, I'd get married again.' 

WIFE: 'You would?'

HUSBAND: .......?

WIFE: 'Would you live in our house?'

HUSBAND: 'Sure, it's a great house.'

WIFE: 'Would you let her drive my car?'

HUSBAND: 'Probably, it is almost new.'

WIFE: 'Would you replace my pictures with hers?'

HUSBAND: 'That would seem like the proper thing to do..'

WIFE: 'Would you give her my jewelry?'

HUSBAND: 'No, I'm sure she'd want her own.'

WIFE: 'Would she wear my shoes'

HUSBAND: 'No, her size is 6.'

WIFE: -- silence .......

HUSBAND: 'oh shit'. 

buy a train!

i received this email from my bff, al0ng.. kelakar sgt2.. ^_^

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Arab student sends an e-mail to his Dad saying:

Dear Dad,

Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here, but Dad, I am bit ashamed to arrive to my college with my Gold Mercedes, when all my Teachers travel by train.

Your Son

Nasser

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Sometime later Nasser gets reply to his e-mail from his Dad:

Loving son,

Twenty Million Dollars transferred to your account, please stop embarrassing us, go and get yourself a train too.

Your Dad

---------------------------------------------------------

cerai???

Satu petang yang hening, aku duduk berehat-rehat di balkoni rumah sambil mengusha anak-anak dara yang lalu lalang. Sementara itu anakku, Boboy yang berusia 3 tahun sedang bermain-main di ruangan tengah, aku lihat dia tersenyum seorang diri. Apalah yang dia tgh fikir agaknya.

Isteri? Ada kat dapur nun, memasak. Betapa bahagianya famili aku ini. Isteriku memang cukup rajin memasak, anak-anakku pulak petah berkata-kata menghiburkan kami sekeluarga. Alahaiiiiiiiii!! Aku senyum sorang-sorang dek bangga memiliki famili ni. Tengah aku dok senyum, tetibe Boboy datang.

‘Abah… Mak nak cerai…’

Aku tersentap.. Mataku berpinar. Anak-anak dara yang lalu lalang, kelihatan macam nenek yang sedang bertaichi. 

Tetiba je nak mintak pepisahan??? 

Aku ni bukanlah insan yang lemah. Segalanya cukup baik dari segi nafkah zahir, nafkah batin, sume dah bagi kat bini aku tuh.Rumah yang aku duduk skang ni pun aku tumpang aje. (Dia yang beli, so dia ler yang bayar. Hehehe!!) Pas tu kereta yang kat depan rumah tu memang aku habis bayar pun khas untuk dia (Perodua Kancil 660 tahun 1999) Ape lagi yang kurang?? Dengan panas kepala, aku terjah dia kat dapur.

"KIAH, APO KUGHRENYO KASIH SAYE ABE KO MU? APO ABE LO NI DOK COMEY LAGI KO?? SAMPA HATI MU BUAK LAGU NIH…"

"Ape nie Bang?? Susah sangat ke nak bagi?"

"KIAH!! MU JANGE NOK UJI"

"Iyelah. Kalau berani buat lah…"

"KIAAAAAAAAAAAH!! MU NI DOH MELAMPAU!"

Kaki aku dah mengeletar, peluh menitik-nitik, hidung aku kembang kempis, kat telinga plak dah terdengar-dengar lagu Anang Hermansyah. Jari-jemari plak sejuk membeku. Sanggupkah aku ucapkan perkataan itu???

"Iyeeeeeeee. Buatlah Abang oiiii. Saya nak masak gulai ni. Kang hangit kang.. Pegilah ambik serai tu cepat. Boboy tak cakap kat awak ke??"

"HAH SERAI???????"  

Bertuah punyer anak... Pelat.... 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hahahahahhahahahahaha!!! citer ni i got from fb.. kelakar giler.. :P

~ modern women ~

i got tis from my bestfriend, along..

thank u for emailing tis to me dear..

kelakar sgt.. hehe..

enjoy ladies.. :)

These are the type of women we should be marrying....Mordern women - so says the men?

It is a myth that when a son gets married and a new daughter-in-law arrives in the family, everything changes.
Some daughters-in-law are well trained and well mannered....They don't come to change the family, they are here to... (READ ON!)

The new wife was being welcomed at the husband's home in a traditional manner. As expected she gave a speech;
"My dear family, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home and family, firstly, my being here does not mean that I would want to change your way of life, your routine ."No, I will never do that, never in a million years."

"What do you mean my child?" asked the father-in-law.
"What I mean dad is (looking at her in-laws);

Those who used to wash the dishes must carry on washing them.
Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it.
Those who cooked should not stop at my account, AND
Those who used to clean should continue cleaning!!!

"And what are you here for?" enquired the mother-in-law.

"AS FOR ME, I'M HERE JUST TO ENTERTAIN YOUR SON!!!!!"